I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
She's just so happy...and so naked.
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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