I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
Hooked up with a guy dressed as Miss Frizzle last night... Asked if I could ride his Magic School Bus
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
Randomize
