She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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