Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
It all started with a game of naked twister.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
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