this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize
