I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
