I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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