There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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