A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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