so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Dude you can't like a status about me getting hit by a car
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
That was an excessively violent trivia night
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
We need a shit load of segways right now
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
Randomize
