Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
