I wanna passion pit in your ass
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Better skin, bigger boobs.. Birth control is INCREASING my chance of getting pregnant because people actually want to have sex with me now.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I just found a bagel and a condom in my coat pocket. I love blackouts
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
So, I have realized that I am kryptonite for married men. I'm not sure how to feel about this sober, but drunk me accepts her destiny.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
Randomize
