3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
But yesterday I literally met half his family buzzed wearing a cheeta print bathing suit super short shorts and a tiny tank top.. I was like awesome
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Randomize
