so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV
you're the only one i would trust to do that
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
