clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Randomize