Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Eating pizza and drinking wine while I watch the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show. The wine is for reducing the pain of falling asleep with more insecurities than what I woke up with.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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