Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
My life is pants optional.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
