she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I need water and some morals
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Randomize
