if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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