p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Can I color on your dick again?
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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