I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
Randomize
