okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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