You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
Randomize
