My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
