I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Walking out of our apartment this morning to go to class, I saw a sticky note on the front door that said "get tested." The door was unlocked so did you bring some stranger back last night? I'm assuming you weren't referring to me...
Trumps. I've been wiping my ass with fast food napkins for 3 days.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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