Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
We didn't have sex because he locked himself in the bathroom and passed out while he was taking a shit. I cuddled with his cat.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize