Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
