i don't like sucking hair
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
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