New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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