it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
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