Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
I love how our sober spotter means you only have to stay sober enough to type your pin in an ATM
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Randomize
