Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize