You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
