Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
I mean what are real friends for if they won't hold down your wedding dress to allow for a keg stand
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
