I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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