Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
They just sang me a song about how small my dick is in front of the whole bar
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
