She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
Randomize
