I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Whose surfboard did we steal and why is there a wood carving of a pelican in the fridge where the beer used to be?
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize