Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
