Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
Let's paint friendship bongs
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
my penis made a compromise with my morals
Randomize
