He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
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