Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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