So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
he thought i was a dude.
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Tell me again your tentative move date. There are 5 Russians in my apartment on ecstasy and they are having a rave in my living room. I can't. I need to move stat
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
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