you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
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