yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
