you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
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