dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I went outside for a smoke at 4 and things seemed normal. It's 6 now and the front lawn is COVERED in tortilla chips. WTF?
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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