somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
NO NINJA FIGHTING AT THE GAS STATION
Randomize
