the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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