Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
